Why is caring for elderly parents so hard?

Swapping roles with our parents isn't easy, and that's what we do when we take responsibility for their Home Care in Atlanta GA. Dealing with the mood swings of an aging and unwell parent, his depression, his stubbornness, and sometimes his frustration and anger at not being well can be a challenge. Tasks and responsibilities increase over time. Caregivers want to do it all, but they start to feel like they're not appreciated. The desire to “be everything” causes a deterioration in physical health and emotional stress.

Asking for help is a solution that many caregivers don't see as an option: until a disaster strikes, perhaps several times, caregivers don't get help because they realize that “everything doesn't work out as you expect.” Boys, especially daughters, are often the most affected by caring for the elderly, caring for children and other domestic responsibilities within families and around the world. Many are forced to leave their careers to manage these overwhelming responsibilities. Patience and persistence go a long way in making conversations productive when it comes to aging parents. Don't go with the expectation that everything will be resolved in one fell swoop.

You may have to raise your concerns with your parents several times, so be patient. Bombarding the older person you love with too much information in a single conversation can needlessly trigger their fear of losing control. And if your loved one has dementia or cognitive impairment, they may not be able to take in too much information at once. Caring for older parents often starts with small things, such as going to the grocery store, picking up prescriptions, and helping with household chores.

It's no wonder that caregivers and elderly parents or spouses become exhausted and emotionally drained while caring for others. Refusing personal care, especially showering or bathing, is quite common in older adults, especially if they are living with Alzheimer's disease or another type of dementia. This on-the-job training can feel like being on a roller coaster ride with all the ups and downs, especially when caregivers have no idea of caregiving responsibilities and have no previous life experience as caregivers for aging parents. Few realize that the measures taken today as young adults have an impact on their quality of life as they age, on whether a caregiver will be needed, or on the impact of health on health care spending during retirement.

If your parents are still determined to stay in their four-bedroom home or to keep driving, calmly let them know the possible consequences of their actions. When asked for help, the same brothers and sisters quickly run in the opposite direction because, while they are good at giving advice, they are bad at following their own advice about caring for elderly parents. Over time, as the health of loved ones continues to deteriorate, caregivers may feel hopeless or powerless not knowing what to do. Many older people and their families would prefer to age at home, increasing the demand for people who can care for them there.

When practical care is needed to dress, bathe, maintain continence and hygiene, stress levels increase. The Department of Health and Human Services will develop a national strategy to provide training and resources, financial and employment support, and a break to caregivers.